Jump Grenade Draft Cover copyright 2018 by Michael D. Smith Billy Bolamme, sixteen-year-old star Junior Dropout Basketball League player, transmogrifies into avenging avatar Ocean Singe Horror after missing his 500th point in a row. In a temper tantrum he kills a taunting radio announcer with hand grenades, then blows up the entire sports arena in order to eliminate ten thousand witnesses to his crime. From here on out his fame and luck can only grow.

Draft 3 in process, 2019

Characters

Billy Bolamme copyright 2016 by Michael D. SmithBilly Bolamme, sixteen-year-old wunderkind of the Junior Dropout Basketball League, a shamanic force of destruction and murder who changes his name to Ocean Singe Horror on a well-publicized LSD trip during a basketball game

Hiram Pebley Bolamme, Billy’s father, coach and owner of the Bolammes basketball team, an ineffectual, dreamy art gallery owner as well as a wealthy do-gooder who started the Junior Dropout Basketball League with his wife Madeline

Guenevere “Universe” Ryder, art gallery receptionist, Billy’s sixteen-year-old girlfriend, and unwitting accomplice in thirty thousand murders

Madeline Bolamme, Billy’s mother and the director of the Bolamme Center for Hurt Feelings

Dan Ryder, suicidal Bolammes main announcer and Universe’s father

Franklin Chester, former Bolammes player and now Bolammes co-announcer

Mongar Frederick, detective with the Plattville Homicide Bureau

Jonathan Mueller, surviving witness of the Baltimore disaster who dies after giving testimony about Billy’s involvement

Emala Ryder, Universe’s mother and dean of the Billy State University School of Library Science

Contents

  1. Maybe it was That Low-Cut Cocktail Dress
  2. The Radio Booth
  3. Encyclowhatever, by Universe, or, The Library School’s Library
  4. The Pregame Show
  5. Billy has Racked Up an Amazing 450 Points in a Row
  6. The Pebbled Orange Surface of his Basketball
  7. The Official Junior Dropout Basketball League Guide to Ocean Singe Horror
  8. Never Can Tell When You Might Need a Natural Gas Line
  9. It’s Really Been Quite a Lucrative Deal all the Way Around
  10. Snooty Art with Sexy Receptionists, or, Her Outfit for Any Given Day Costs More than You Will Ever Make Selling Your Paintings
  11. The Planet Lamura, Star System 63
  12. A Vast Stretch of the Universe Where Aliens Beings Might Sense Pain and Show Up to Inspect It
  13. Billy State University
  14. Plattville
  15. DENY! DENY!
  16. I’m Just Watching the Dome, Dude, That’s All
  17. The Yellow Armies of Risk
  18. Detective Mongar Frederick
  19. For Thirty Thousand Lifetimes

 

All words and images copyright by Michael D. Smith